Do you have a friend that seems like they’re a good guy one day and a bad guy the next? If their personality doesn’t seem stable, they might have a mental disorder called, Borderline Personality.
What is borderline personality disorder?
Borderline personality disorder is a mental illness characterized by unstable moods, behavior and even relationships. Studies shows that only 2% of adults have this behavior – majority are 30-40 years old. This type of personality is difficult for the person and their love ones. People with BPD often have self-doubt and have frequent thoughts of suicide. They need extensive mental health services, which can lead into living a productive lifestyle.
Dealing with a love one with such a disorder can be difficult, but there are ways to keep the peace in the relationship and show the support the person needs. Remember, BPD have a hard time regulating their emotions and behavior. However, there are a few things you can do to help your love one live a productive life.
1. Communication: Like in every healthy relationship, communication is the key. Talking to a love one with BPD and setting healthy boundaries can help them build trust and respect towards you. You may not receive the best response. Therefore, explain to the person the boundaries and why when both parties are calm.
2. Concentrate on emotions: Unlike others, what BPD people say may not interpret to how they want you to take it. When they are in an emotional state they may not make sense in the conversation. Try to stay calm and analyze behaviors. The response should be based of what they are telling you through interpersonal behavior. If it ends in an argument you are allowed to walk away in the situation. When everything is calm, tell the person why you had to walk away.
3. You’re allowed to think of yourself: Sometimes conversations can be rocky. Things that aren’t meant to be said were placed on the table and it may be “toxic” in the moment. It is fine to walk away and have time to yourself. However, concentrate on the good aspects in the relationship and explain to your loved one why you were hurt and how it can be solved.
Having a loved one with borderline personality means the relationship require more attention and effort. Yet if set with healthy boundaries and a good sense of communication, the relationship can be rewarding.